''Unveiling the power of EGO: How your ego impacts your emotion''.

''The ego, however, is not who you really are. The ego is your self-image; it is the role you are playing. Your social mask thrives on approval. It wants control and is sustained by power because it lives in fear''. - Deepak Chopra

Your survival mechanism is not only the factor affecting your emotions. Your ego plays an important part in forming the way you feel. Thus, to acquire more control over your emotions, it is basic you understand what your ego is and how it works.

Now, let's make clear what we mean by ego. We frequently say that someone has a ''big ego'' reference to the ego as something close to honor. While honor is definitely a manifestation of ego, that's only one part of it. You could show no honor and appear respectful while still being managed by your ego.

SO, WHAT IS THE EGO?

The ego refers to the self-identity you've raised throughout your life. How was this identity created? Put simply, the ego was created through your thoughts, and as a mind-created identity, has no touchable reality.

Events that take place to you carry no meaning in themselves. You give them meaning only through your interpretation of those events. Additionally, you agree to receive things about yourself because people told you to do so. What's more, you recognize your name, your age, your religion, your political beliefs, or your occupation in the same way.

This extension has significance. As we'll see later in this blog, attachment creates beliefs, and these beliefs lead you to experience certain emotions. For example, you may become offended when people attack your religion or attack your political principles.

Note that throughout this blog, we'll refer to the ego as your ''story'' or your ''identity'' using these words interchangeably.

ARE YOU AWARE OF YOUR EGO?

Your understanding of the way your ego works depends on your level of self-awareness. People at the minor or subordinate level of consciousness are not even aware the ego lives and as a result, are oppressed by it.

On the other hand, highly uncomfortable people can see through their egos. They understand how belief works and how extreme extension to a set of beliefs can create suffering in their life. In effect, these people become the lords of their minds and are calm with themselves.

Note that the ego is neither good nor bad. It's just a result of an absence of self-consciousness. It dims away as you become aware of it since ego and awareness cannot synchronize.

YOUR EGO NEEDS FOR AN IDENITY.

Your ego is a selfish system, only worried about its own survival. Interestingly, it's rather similar to your brain in the way it works. It has its own survival mechanism and will do whatever it can to persist. As with your brain, its primary duty is neither your happiness nor your peace of mind. On the opposing, your ego is uneasy. It wants you to be a go-getter. It wants you to do, have, and achieve great things so you can become a 'somebody'.

As we already mentioned, your ego needs an identity to live. The way it does that is through identification with things, people's beliefs, and ideas.

Now, let's look at some of the things your ego relates with to make strong its identity.

PHYSICAL ITEMS:

The ego likes to identify with physical things. As might be expected, it succeeds in today's world. Perhaps, we can say capitalism and the consumer society we're living in today are the formation of combined egos, which is why it has been the ruling economic model in the recent period of 10 years. Marketers perfectly understand people's need to recognize things. They know people don't just buy a product, they also buy the emotions and story attached to the product. Often, you can purchase trusted clothes and particular things because you want to tell a story about yourself. For example- you may desire to increase your status, look cool, or express your unique personality, and choose the products most closely connected with these perfect. This is how the ego works. It uses things to generate a story you can identify with. It doesn't mean things are wrong per se. It's a negative issue only when you become overly attached to things, believing they can fulfill you- which they can't.

YOUR BODY:

Many people obtain their self-worth from their physical appearance. Your ego loves the way you look because it is the easiest thing to remember and quantify. When you strongly link with your physical appearance, you are disposed to identify more easily with physical and emotional pain. Believe it or not, you can notice your body without 'identifying with it'.

FRIENDS/ ACQUAINTANCES:

The ego also obtains its sense of recognition from your relationships with others. The ego is only interested in what it can get from others. In other words, the ego flourishes in the way it can use people to strengthen its identity. If you are honest with yourself, you'll notice most of the things you do are to strive to obtain acceptance of others. You want your parents to be proud of you, your boss to respect you, and your wife to love you.

PARENT/ CHILD RELATIONSHIPS:
Some parent's egos guide the creation of a strong sense of extension and recognition with their children. This is based on the false belief their children are their ''possessions''. As a result, they want to control their children's lives and use them to live the life they wanted to live when they were teenagers- this is called living vicariously through your children. You see this all the time. Next time you watch a junior football, watch the parents on the touchline to see how some react. Try observing the parents living vicariously- they are the ones yelling the loudest, and not simply in motivation. This may happen largely accidentally.

COUPLES:

The feeling of requiring someone is very much a play of the ego as well. Anthony de Mello has a beautiful way to put it when he says: ''Loneliness is not cured by human company. Loneliness is cured by contact with reality, by understanding that we don't need people''. -ANTHONY DE MELLO Once you realize you don't actually need anyone, you can initiate enjoying people's company. You can see them as they really are rather than trying to get something from them.

OTHER OBJECTS OF IDENTIFICATION:

Now let's have a look at a non-exhaustive list of things your ego generally derives its identity from:

YOUR BODY.
YOUR NAME.
YOUR GENDER.
YOUR NATIONALITY.
YOUR CULTURE.
YOUR FAMILY/FRIENDS.
YOUR BELIEFS( POLITICAL BELIEFS, RELIGIOUS)
YOUR PERSONAL STORY.
YOUR PROBLEMS.
YOUR AGE.
YOUR JOB.
YOUR SOCIAL ISSUE.
YOUR ROLE.
MATERIAL ITEMS.
YOUR DESIRES.

THE EGO'S MAIN CHARACTERISTICS: Here are some characteristics of the ego:

- The ego is inclined to equate ''having' with 'being', which is why the ego likes to recognize objects.

- The ego lives through comparison. Your ego likes to compare itself with other egos.

- The ego is never satisfied. Your ego always wants more. More fame, More stuff, and so on.

- The ego sense of self-worth often depends on the worth you have in the eyes of others. Your ego needs the approval of other people to feel valued.

EGO NEEDS TO FEEL SUPERIOR:

EGO wants to stand out and needs to create artificial disconnections. Here are some stratagems:

1. Enhancing its value through people: if you have some reputated friends or famous friends, your ego will link with them to make stronger its identity. This is why some people love to inform others how smart, rich, or famous their friends are.

2. Gossiping: People gossip because it makes them feel different and superior in some way. this is why some people like to put other people down and talk behind their backs; it makes them- and everybody else in their gossiping group- feel superior.

3. Manifesting an inferiority complex: This conceals a want to be better than others. Yes, even in this case, people want to feel superior.

4. Manifesting a superiority complex: This hides the fear of not being good enough.

5. Looking for fame: This provides the vision of superiority, which is why people often dream of becoming famous.

6. Being right: The ego loves to be right. It's a great way for it to declare it's alive. Have you noticed that everybody, from Adolf Hitler to Nelson Mandela, believes they're doing the right thing? Most people think they are correct. But can everybody be right?

7. Complaining: When people complain, by definition they believe are right and others are wrong. It works with objects as well. Have you ever bumped into a table and complained or even insulted it? I have, and the darned table was wrong to be in my way, wasn't it?

8. Seeking attention: The ego likes to stand out. It loves identification, praise, or admiration. To seek attention, people may also commit crimes, wear electronic clothes, or have tattoos all over their bodies.

YOUR EGO IMPACTS ON YOUR EMOTION:

Understanding the way you work can help you better control your emotions. To do this, you must first realize your current story is the result of a strong identification with people, things, or ideas. This strong identification is the root of many of the negative emotions you experience in your life. For example:

- When life doesn't unfold according to your personal story you get upset, or

- When someone challenges one of your beliefs you become defensive.

CONCLUSION:

In short, most of your emotions are based on your personal story and the way you perceive the world. As you replace your current story with a more empowering one- While, at the same time, letting go of your excessive attachment to things, people, or ideas- you will be able to experience more positive emotions. Later in the coming blog, you'll see how you can change the way you interpret events.

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''An act of ego : Everything you need to learn about ego''.